Hi all
Here is a free verse poem I’ve written today, and I will run through aspects of it, just to explain it’s meaning and what influences led me to write in this style.
In hope you find this helpful. If you have any questions or responses, feel free to reply to me.
Here is the poem:
Elegy For a Father’s Voice
A poem
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father, your voice
fading like the last star
at dawn, a soft hum
in the marrow of morning.
your words, once a beacon
guiding me through the night,
now drift away, fainter and fainter,
as the sun rises to banish the dark.
i strain to hear that familiar timbre,
that gruff yet gentle cadence
that has soothed me, sustained me
through so many long, lonely hours.
but your voice, like the retreating stars,
slips beyond my grasp,
dissolving into the first golden rays
that herald a new day’s dawning.
and in that silence, that void left behind,
i feel the weight of your absence
settle deep within my bones,
a heaviness that aches to be filled.
i reach out, desperate to recapture
even the faintest echo, the softest refrain,
to hold on to that which is slowly,
irrevocably slipping away.
yet your song, like the night itself,
must yield to the inevitable rise of morn.
all i can do is bear witness to its fade,
and hope that one day, it will return.
The poem "Elegy For a Father's Voice" is a poignant and evocative exploration of the loss of a father's voice and the profound impact it has on the speaker. Through vivid imagery and metaphorical language, the poem captures the essence of grief and the longing to hold onto the fading remnants of a cherished connection.
Meaning:
The poem is a lament for the gradual loss of the father's voice, which is likened to the fading of the stars at dawn. The speaker expresses a deep yearning to hear that familiar, comforting voice that once guided them through life's challenges. As the father's voice grows fainter, the speaker feels a sense of emptiness and an aching absence that settles deep within their bones.
The poem conveys the universal experience of loss and the struggle to accept the inevitability of change. The father's voice, once a beacon of guidance and solace, is now slipping away, leaving the speaker grasping for echoes and refrains that are slowly dissolving into the light of a new day.
Form and Influences:
The poem is written in free verse, allowing for a more organic and unrestrained flow of language and imagery. The lack of a strict meter or rhyme scheme creates a sense of fluidity and emotional rawness that complements the subject matter.
The poem draws inspiration from nature imagery, particularly the contrast between night and day, and the metaphorical use of stars and the rising sun to symbolize the fading of the father's voice and the dawning of a new reality without it.
There is a strong influence of Romantic poetry in the way the poem personifies and imbues natural elements with emotional significance, as well as in the emphasis on subjective experience and the exploration of intense emotions.
Construction:
The poem is structured around a series of vivid metaphors and comparisons, each one building upon the central theme of loss and the fading of the father's voice. The opening lines establish the metaphor of the father's voice as a star, gradually fading as dawn approaches.
The use of sensory details, such as the "marrow of morning" and the "gruff yet gentle cadence," creates a tangible and personal connection to the father's voice, heightening the sense of loss when it begins to fade.
The poem's imagery is rich and evocative, painting a vivid picture of the speaker's emotional landscape as they grapple with the weight of the father's absence and the desire to hold onto the fleeting echoes of his voice.
The final lines of the poem offer a glimmer of hope, suggesting that while the night must yield to the inevitable dawn, there is a possibility that the father's voice, like the stars, may one day return.
And finally:
6 Tips on What Not to Do When Writing Poems:
1. Avoid clichés and overused phrases: Strive for originality and freshness in your language and imagery.
2. Don't force rhymes or stick to rigid structures if it compromises the poem's natural flow and meaning.
3. Resist the temptation to overexplain or spell out every detail; leave room for interpretation and allow the reader to engage with the poem on a deeper level.
4. Avoid excessive sentimentality or melodrama, as it can undermine the emotional impact of your work.
5. Don't rely too heavily on abstract concepts or vague language; ground your poems in concrete imagery and sensory details.
6. Avoid unnecessary repetition or wordiness; strive for concision and economy of language while maintaining the poem's emotional resonance.
Next week, I’ll look at the minimalist style of poetry writing, characterised by such contemporary poets as Rupi Kaur. This is a very effective style, and one of my favourites.
Tom